Unbiased Jill Biden moderating next debate

After debate moderator Steve Scully was caught on Twitter being extremely biased… I meant to say after debate moderator Steve Scully unfortunately had his Twitter account hacked by a hacker who only posted one tweet that seemed way too insignificant and subtle if you had gone to all the trouble of hacking such a high profile account, crazy right-wingers demanded an unbiased moderator. The Biden campaign countered with a move so brilliant Joe’s blinding white teeth seem dull in contrast. The move was to offer totally fair and unbiased Jill Biden as moderator. Joe said this about the decision to have his wife moderate,

“Look my sister has known me my whole life. She’s always been fair to me, and sometimes even critical of me. There is no way Jill is biased, if she was biased would I have married her? Come on man, that’s crazy, my sister isn’t biased, that’s like asking you, hey man, do you have opinions? Or a drug problem? I mean what are we talking about here, we should be talking about Donald Trump, and, and, and, he did something else bad today…”

Ummm…. Critics are saying Biden called his wife his sister, but clearly he is talking about two separate issues in this quotation. He is actually working on such a high mental level that he is answering two totally separate questions at the same time. He’s so smart he’s outsmarting all of us and that’s why we can’t understand him sometimes. Donald Trump has stated, without evidence, that Joe is married to Jill Biden, and that is unfair. He even went so far as to claim, without evidence, that this would be similar to asking Melania Trump to moderate a debate. The Biden peeps silenced all haters with this third degree burn of a tweet,

“Um, yea Trump, Jill Biden is totally biased lol. She has a doctorate, and she’s a woman. Also, comparing Jill Biden to Melania, the wife of a fascist dictator, is so degrading to women that you should be charged with sexual assault.”

Take that Donald Trump, you big jerk.