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  • TJ Shaver

The devil is gay

The devil, or Satan as he likes to call himself because he thinks it sounds cooler, is getting really popular all of a sudden. The Huffington post, or Satan as I like to call them because it’s more accurate, recently ran an article explaining why a democrat chose to embrace satanism after the death of RBG, which is not a surprising correlation to me. But I am surprised these democrats are trying to spread the message of Satan so openly just because there is a microscopic chance that there might be minor restrictions placed on abortions in certain states. I understand that rabid abortion activists are obsessed with sacrificing babies to Satan but it’s pretty bold to admit it now.

In other Satan news Lil Nas X, or Satan as he wants to be called now, recently released a shoe with a pentagram and human blood in the sole and all it costs is way too much and your soul because what the actual ****? His new music video also features him doing things with Satan that seemed uncomfortable at best and literally hell at worst, and then he becomes Satan or something, I don’t know, it was kind of really really stupid. And tacky. So who cares right? I do. The Huffington Post article laid out the tenets of Satanism and the democrat became a Satanist because she said the tenets lined up perfectly with her progressive left politics. The article explains it so well I don’t want to satirize it or overdo it, it does that to itself, not surprising considering the masturbatory content that the Huffington Post is known for, because they are narcissistic sexual miscreants and deviants who do nothing but sit in a circle and je- hm… Sorry about that. Anyway,

Christians aren’t allowed to go to Church in as many places as democrats can get away with it, businesses are being sued into financial ruin for refusing to write messages that violate their religious beliefs, articles are being written in mainstream democrat media that say evangelical Christianity is the greatest threat to life on Earth, Christians are being associated with white supremacy almost every day on everything from CNN, to the Washington Post, the New York Times, MSNBC, and all the other burning piles of human waste that constitute what is known as the mainstream media, or Satan as I like to call them. So is it any wonder that Satan is getting really popular again? I mean, if you want to fight God, you team up with his archenemy right? Even when you know he is a piece of shit loser that already lost and will lose again. The mainstream world will always hate Christians, and God, and the Truth, because that is what the world does. If you find yourself on the side that is suddenly very pro-Satan… maybe consider that you could be on the wrong side. Because you’re on the wrong side. You’re on Satan’s side. The Huffington Post told me so, and they would know, they are Satan.

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