Peaceful murderers charged with protesting

With the definitions of words changing every day we do our best to keep up. We usually fail. Today we are going to get it right though, because we care. With peaceful protests continuing all across the country, some people are getting worried that so many end with murder. Most people can’t understand that there are peaceful protests and then there are criminals taking advantage and there are also far left activists taking advantage. There are many separate groups out there creating havoc. We don’t like nuance though so we will continue to call them all peaceful protesters, even the ones who kill people. A peaceful murderer had his to say,

“I have a right to peacefully protest. If that peacefulness results in me shooting someone over a disagreement, all you have to do is change enough definitions to make me the good guy. You do it all the time. I should be charged with protesting, not murder. I protested him to death sure, but it was a protest.”

The court listened to his plea and lowered the charges from murder to protesting, and the media did their part by calling him a protester instead of a murderer. Soon enough everyone thought he was a good guy fighting racial injustice instead of a criminal who exploited the protests to commit a heinous crime resulting in an innocent person dying. Simone Biles couldn’t do the gymnastics it takes to get where we just took you mentally. A gymnastics expert told us this in an exclusive interview,

“It isn’t easy to twist the mind the way you have to in order to arrive at these conclusions. But it also isn’t impossible. Just change murder to protest and protest to murder and you're done. If that’s all people see for 3 days, it becomes an accepted fact. It really isn’t that complicated. Now please come down from there, that’s meant for children I’m not sure it can support your weight, ohhh shi…..”

I will continue reporting on the story when I am off crutches.