Hydroxychloroquine works but we'll never admit it

New studies have come out showing promising results for using hydroxychloroquine as a treatment for Covid-19. Unfortunately Donald Trump not only endorsed this drug, he has been taking it. The new rules of journalism determine that if Trump said it, it has to be bad. So we choose to ignore these promising studies, even if they could save lives. A modern journalism expert had this to say,

“It could save lives, and it could have been saving lives all along. We couldn’t save lives though because then we’d be admitting Trump was right, and as we all know, if we endorse Trump, everyone will die. So we’re saving lives by taking lives.”

Sounds good to us. As soon as we heard that the studies were promising we knew we had to find a way to discredit them. We can’t find any ways to discredit the studies though so we will just bury this and never talk about it. As long as we don’t admit hydroxychloroquine works, no one will ever know and we can keep pretending Donald Trump is putting people’s lives in danger every time he talks about it. Our publicist told us to say this,

“Donald Trump is an existential threat.”

We’re part of the media now!