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  • TJ Shaver

Cuomo passes heart disease; now #1 killer of elderly

The Ol’ Lady Killer has done it again. Andrew Cuomo, that Ol’ Lady Killer, killed so many old ladies that he has surpassed Heart Disease as the #1 killer of elderly humans in the United States. Not many people thought he could do it, including Gretchen Whitmer who found herself in competition with Cuomo and Heart Disease, but in the end Cuomo prevailed and your grandmother probably died. A spokesman for Heart Disease had this to say about the contest,

“This is a fluke, an anomaly. We’ve been at the top for so long that of course it’s shocking when someone can kill so many people so fast... but we will recover I assure you. Unless people keep voting for democrats in which case, our days of leading death are done.”

One of Cuomo’s aides recently admitted that they had indeed been lying about murdering old people by sending sick people to nursing homes. They also admitted that they had been covering it up. I hate to say I told you so, haha just kidding, I love saying I told you so because I did tell you so because it’s obvious that Andrew Cuomo is a lying homicidal power hungry bozo who was only getting his ass kissed by the media because Donald Trump mean jerk bad impeach insurrection etc… There were other governors doing the same thing, killing old people. They were all democrats, all pro lockdown, all tyrants. Andrew Cuomo literally had this to say in his defense,

“They died, who cares?”

Bravo Andrew, that’s why I call you the Ol’ Lady Killer. Because you kill old ladies. He also hates Jews.

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