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  • TJ Shaver

Cuomo exaggerates accent; also kills old people

Updated: Jul 21, 2020

In a time where we need our leaders to be honest and forthcoming, one Governor has been anything but. Governor of New York Andrew Cuomo has been on tv every day saying the same bulls#!+ over and over and the media praises him for it even though his state has the highest covid death count by about 3 miles last time I measured. He is also the individual that ordered nursing homes to take in patients who were positive for the virus, effectively killing thousands of grandmothers, maybe even your own personal grandmother. Most egregious of all, he’s been exaggerating his accent. An accent expert had this to say,

“Oh yeah, that’s exaggerated. He’s seen too many mafia movies, probably idolized the characters from the Godfather. He’s trying to sound cool. Trying to sound tough. He’s obviously trying to make up for the fact that he has nipple rings and is an incompetent governor but a frighteningly effective grandparent killer. As long as he sounds like this, this man is extremely dangerous.”

No one seems to care that he handled the pandemic worse than anyone in the country, maybe worse than anywhere in the world. He blames Trump and everyone laps it up because that is what they want to hear. No one remembers anything that just happened. They believe what they are told to believe. It’s journalistic malpractice and it has an out sized hand in the rapid decline of civilization that we are watching unfold. Cuomo’s brother Chris, CNN anchor and functioning retarded man had this to say on a hot mic,

“Good job on that accent bro, I wish I would have made mine stronger from the beginning. If I switched now everyone would notice and It’d be a whole thing. Yeah bro you do sound totally cool, just like somebody from Goodfellas. Yep, just like we’ve always practiced. Yes dinner at my place tonight, your turn to bring the human sacrifice.”

It seems like there might be another scandal here but we can’t seem to put our finger on it.

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