Black squares are the vaccine for racism

While we were foolishly looking for a vaccine for a disease that disappeared overnight, a more important vaccine was staring us in the face the whole time. Corporate America and countless heroes stumbled upon it on what will forever be known as blackout tuesday. Apparently, posting a black square on social media fixes racism. Just like that. Boom. No experts needed. An especially non-expert local hero had this to say,

“I saw it and I knew I had to do it. Everyone else was.”

Hate groups dropped to their knees, trembling, afraid, uncertain of their next move. Before they knew it all the hate had left their hearts. All their bad ideas fled their stupid heads. Their racist tattoos faded from their bodies. Hate gangs dispersed with not even tentative plans to meet again. The problem had been solved with social media and heroism thanks to the public relations departments of the biggest companies in America who came up with the idea in hopes that their stores wouldn’t be burned to the ground. An important CEO who wouldn’t let us use his name told us this,

“It worked? Wheewwww!!! What a relief! I’m so relieved our stores are untouched. I mean racism is over. That’s the part I’m relieved about. And happy about, that's also the part I'm happy about. Can we start over?”

We couldn’t start over.