Biden's basement renamed "New Oval Office"

It is abundantly clear that Joe Biden will be our next President. He is out there campaigning hard and he is totally with it mentally. He can answer questions and he can do it without a teleprompter. Everyone is excited to vote for Joe Biden. Everyone in America wants Joe Biden to be President so bad that they have declared a preemptive victory over President Trump and have renamed Joe’s basement the New Oval Office. He will begin serving his term immediately and he will never have to leave his basement again. An alleged Biden spokesman had this to say,

“Let’s be clear here, Joe is perfectly capable of winning the election, and of leaving his basement. He doesn’t have to do those things however, so he isn’t going to. Let’s be clear here, this is not about Joe potentially being incoherent and kept prisoner in his own house while his advisers and Kamala Harris carry out all of his duties. This is about Donald Trump. We will not dignify the former Oval Office with Joe’s sacred presence after Donald Trump defiled it with his vile presence. Let’s be real clear here.”

Far right extremists have been claiming without evidence that Joe Biden can’t just declare himself President. This rhetoric is dangerous and is only meant to damage the integrity of our democracy. Donald Trump has gone so far as to tweet out the outrageous claim that he is still the President even though he provided no evidence, and worse, the tweet was retweeted by a guy in Iowa who is really into conspiracy theories. The ornery Iowan shared this with us via his c.b. radio,

“How is it a conspiracy theory that the President is the President? These days you can say Donald Trump has been a Russian spy since the 1980's and Brett Kavanaugh is a gang rapist and the entire country is teeming with rabid white supremacists. Those aren’t conspiracy theories, but saying the President is the President makes you the crazy one. I give up.”

This guy provided no evidence for his claim that Donald Trump is the President.