America overrun by Right Wing Violence

Everything the media has been telling you to fear these last four years is turning out to be super true. Donald Trump turned out to be worse than Hitler, his concentration camps killed SEVEN million people, according to unnamed sources. As soon as he was elected the stock market crashed and never recovered, and thank you for the warning Paul Krugman, how do you always know so many things? On election day the Proud Boys surrounded every polling place in the country, wielding baseball bats and threatening non-whites and making them vote for Trump. Also, it turns out that Donald Trump really WAS a Russian asset and he totally colluded with Russia and that Ukraine phone call was also super bad, so bad in fact that it was never brought up in the debates or even mentioned in the whole Biden campaign. Now that it looks like Biden might win, the streets have been overrun by psychotic Trump supporters burning down businesses and killing 35 people. Some have even been seen kneeling and praying. A reporter on the scene shared this harrowing depiction of basically nothing,

“O...M...G… I… Am so. AFRAID. They are out here, and they want someone to be allowed to watch the votes being counted. In other states protesters want them to keep counting votes, and that is hypocritical even though the situations aren’t the same, and that… is terrifying… Some have started kneeling and praying… I probably won’t make it out alive.... What kind of monsters…”

Wow. The crazy right wingers that Trump emboldened with his hate have taken over America. Look outside your window right now. You see it don’t you? A crazy mob of right wingers demanding you kneel or they’ll beat the shit out of you or burn your house down or destroy your business or maybe just kill you. The media wasn’t fake news after all. They aren’t even biased. Nick Sandmann is a monster that committed the hate crime of standing while supporting Trump. Jussie Smollett was attacked by MAGA lunatics in what Kamala Harris accurately described as “A modern day lynching.” Chick Fil A killed all the gays after Mike Pence banned all the gays from the continental United States, and also from continental breakfasts at all hotels in America. If Donald Trump wasn’t in charge not a single person would have died of Covid. Hillary Clinton isn’t Satan himself, she definitely doesn’t have cloven hooves, I’d bet at least a buck on it if you loan me a buck. The media was right. All the things happened. They were all right about all the things. King of Clown World and maybe our next President former lifeguard Joe Biden shared this with us after he shared his fruit cup with us today after his day nurse ended her shift,

“I mean come on man, I won, the right wing violence has to stop… violence from all wings has to stop, you can’t have birds, out in the, I mean, it’s ridiculous, if you look at a bird hurting someone with his wing, let’s just focus on what matters. Getting Donald Trump out of office. Huh? I did? What do now?”

What do now Indeed Joe. What do now, indeed.