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  • TJ Shaver

A good day for Wealthy Whites

The whiter man with whiter hair, whiter teeth, whiter voters and whiter donors has won the White House in a white hot race for the aged. The democrat party, which used to be known as the party of the working class, has officially graduated to become the party of the wealthy whites with a college education and a nice house in a nice suburban city on the coast. Don’t call them coastal elites though, that’s a conspiracy. Don’t call them liberal either, because they definitely aren’t that. Joe Biden’s donors were the biggest corporations in America, and the next biggest corporations in America, and Wall Street, and the pedophiles in Hollywood and of course, the tech tyrants who are totally in touch with the working class of America. The clowns of Silicon Valley sent this message via a robot so they wouldn’t have to pay a human to do it,

“We care about working people, that’s why we want a $15/hr minimum wage. Then they will get laid off because small businesses can’t afford to pay them so they don’t have to work that silly pointless job anymore and they can be free to pursue their dreams like being addicted to our apps and hating their family because of our algorithms. I tip my gardener. Well I have my assistant tip him, I don’t speak Spanish and I prefer not to speak to humans at all, especially the dirty poor ones that I care about so much.''

For a man called the most viciously racist President in American history Donald Trump did historically well with the minority vote. We have no explanation for this nonsense so we’ll just pretend it didn’t happen and also state outright that the democrat party is totally in good shape. Speaking of good shape, once Biden repeals the Trump tax cuts, wealthy whites will still be perfectly fine and the working class will have their taxes raised significantly. It’s a good day for wealthy whites thanks to Joe Biden beating Donald Trump. A wealthy white had this to say,

“We’d be fine either way but we all backed Biden.”

They most certainly did.

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